Chulent is Over
Welp…as some of you may know, there was this big article in the NY Times about this social group I’m peripherally a part of, and indeed, I went to cholent last night, and was horrified by what I saw. There were hordes of Upper West and Upper East Side Jews in search of “the scene.â€? Some wanted the chulent (those would be the Upper-West Siders), and some inquired as to the appropriate amount of the “suggested donationâ€? (those would be the Upper-East Siders). Some of the high-heeled crowd were puzzled by the lack of an elevator, and many complained about the smoke…even while outside. There was some perfumed yuppie from NY Magazine doing yet another article as well, and she kept insisting her story was already in the works before the Times piece came out, and she was interviewing people I’ve never even seen before.
And then there were the kiruvniks. Formerly of Big Aish, Rabbi Sammy “Are you ready to rock?!?� was there, and he declared that, “Judaism is the ultimate counter-culture!� Sholom the anarchist rabbi almost pummeled the poor bastard, but unfortunately, some dude in a serugah intervened (you know how the Zionists are). He offered some platitudes about Jewish unity, and probably because of the vodka mixed with beer, I went outside and promptly vomited.
Anyway, that’s it for that.
22 comments
give them a few weeks, they’ll taper off faster than a businessman who doesn’t have to say kaddish anymore.
Ugh. That is so lame. I’d throw up too.
those U.E.S. made me sick it was the first time that i did not enjoy shulent night.
we might have to give sholom the job he wants as doorman, to keep those creatures away.
wow. david. ok. so like failed messiah had this whole piece up which he took down about the chulent being secretly funded by kiruv orgs, and isaac schonfeld being a kiruv plant.
david, i guess you got him to take that down. thanks.
and as for the chulent being over? bullshit. and isaac just wrote me this “you can say 5 maybe 10 new faces which (on the lower estimate) is pretty much standard for any Thursday night.
i had a great time last night. i was there until 5:30.
the chulent has just begun.
Radloh, I don’t know when you were there, but you can’t judge the effects on a scene at 3 in the morning, man. And if I were in Isaacs shoes, well, I would see what I wanted to see as well. No one wants to believe their creation has been overrun. That’s love. But I saw more blonds there than I think I have ever seen at a Jewish event, except maybe a Reform event. But in many ways, I think that makes it more multi-cultural, don’t you agree?
thanks for the post. I didn’t go last night because I figured that would happen, then today someone was bullshitting me that there were no new people.
mohammed,
No one was bullshitting you. There WERE no new people.
Even though it wasn’t my scene when I was there, I was really glad that we went before it became “the scene.” More authentic than it likely is now.
Kelly
I have no idea who you are, which makes is kind of hard for me to assess your trustworthiness. Are you saying the kvetcher is a liar?
there was a band which apparently was well received. i arrived after 2 & stayed till the last drop after 8, & it felt like a typical gezunte night of unzere.
I’m more interested in knowing what went on from 9-1
IT FUCKING ROCKED! I WAS THERE TILL 9 AM WITH THE SAME DAMN PPL WOH INTRODUCED IT TO ME………..AND I HAVE THE VIDEO TO PROOVE IT.
LEAH KLEIM
WHO
Yeah. Chulent Night was so cool before it got all trendy and commercial. Before it sold out to the man! And now attendees include upper east siders, upper west siders, blondes and (gasp!) Zionists! That’s like the LES version of bridge and tunnel people but instead of acid washed jeans, mullets and feathered hair, these posers were wearing high heels! Fuckin’ eh man. It’s just like when CBGB’s was “discovered” by punk wanna bes with trust funds, that’s the day punk music died, circa 1979. Or the day the first gangsta rap album was sold in fucking Iowa to a pimply faced little wigger in big ass pants and a ball cap with the pristine tags curiously still attached. Man. Why do good things always have to end? Why can’t they leave Chulent night to the real bad ass Jews - the frum rejects from the Boro Park and Flatbush ghettos as well as the real LES Jews. Never mind that the latter were born and raised in, like Jersey or White Plains. Don’t be a hata mo fo.
And as for the Zionists, well… nothing goes better with cholent than a rollicking brawl. I eagerly look forward to the next opportunity I have to proudly display on Jewlicious fists bloodied in righteous battle. Better hope you’re not around when that fucking happens.
Heh. Chulent night. Y’all are soooo ghetto.
ck
you’re a dumb fuck with shit for brains and a classic example of the type of shit we were talking about.
I realize this maybe hard for you to understand but our problem isn’t with superficial labels like cool, trendy, ghetto, sold out, the man. We just don’t want to associate with low class animals like you. Why don’t you go have a rollicking brawl in some bar in Harlem and leave us alone?
muhammed you are not in a barn with cows. a little civility please.
radloh
thank you for bringing that to my attention. now fuck off, please.
“mr. logic” strikes again
radloh - you are just a liar, at least attempt to documnent you insane lies.
See, Mohammed? Now you know you can always trust my word.
whatdya got against Blondes, David?
see y’all tomorrow night.
Stay late for christ’s sake…
Kelly
that’s a pretty far fetched conclusion to draw from a one time, coincidental truth telling.
I’ve told the truth once or twice myself.
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