Posts from — March 2008

One of the issues that should be a concern to the secular and liberal Jewish community about Big Kiruv is intermarriage. Much of liberal Jewry’s blind eye to the fundamentalism, deception, and promotion of downward (“You can’t do it!”) mobility that Big Kiruv advocates stems from the community’s fear of hemorrhaging numbers due to intermarriage. In fact, how Big Kiruv deals with intermarriage is itself a major problem.

The ultra-Orthodox, and to a large extent, even the right-wing Modern Orthodox, utterly cut off those who intermarry. Or at least, that is their official position and party line. This is in-line with Europe (supposedly), so we can’t say this has changed all that much in terms of policy. Intermarriage, as we know, is not a popular phenomenon in the FFB (frum from birth) Orthodox world.

But the situation has changed dramatically for the rest of American Jewry. Most American Jews who are secular or liberal have large segments of their families that are intermarried, particularly those of us who have been here for many generations already. Baal Teshuvahs have cousins and siblings that intermarry all the time. The policies advocated by Big Kiruv for dealing with this reality are all too frequently brutal.

On Beyond BT, Elihau Levenson wrote,

“Spiritual attacks today are not coming in forbidding adherence to Jewish law so much as something else, something far more insideous and more difficult to understand; enticements toward intermarriage and assimilation. These are the “nice” attacks, the “sweet” attacks, the “sugared-coated poison” attacks.

To keep this piece from going too long I will focus the rest of this narrative on intermarriage.”

What did he mean? See comment seventy-two for further explanation on this post, where Levenson explained that the statement,

““If anything, the very fact that it’s not that big of a deal for a typical Gentile to welcome a Jew into their family via intermarriage indicates that most people out there aren’t anti-Semitic…”

was incorrect, because

“It is the opposite. This IS anti-semitism. Read carefully Devarim (Deuteronomy) 13:8-11.

There are mean anti-semites, and there are lovely and wonderful anti-semites. There are anti-semites who know they are anti-semites, and there are anti-semites who think they are benefitting the Jews, and don’t have a clue that it is the opposite.”

Beyond BT will delete comments deemed to contain skeptic content, but authors calling intermarried spouses of Jews “anti-semites” is apparently kosher mehadrin l’mehadrin. You can do that on Beyond BT. Because it is a kiruv site. A kiruv site that spoons hardline haredi groups.

Baal Teshuvahs are told they may not attend the weddings of the intermarried, even if they are non-denominational in content. This creates a lot of bad blood. Ultra-Orthodox Jews do not even recognize intermarried couples as actually married. They also do not recognize a biological gentile father of a Baal Teshuvah as his “real” father. In their eyes, no gentile relatives are truly relatives.

Also problematic is forbidding attendance at even liberal Jewish congregations for family occasions such as bar/bat mitzvahs even if not a problem in terms of getting there on Shabbos.

This produces heart-wrenching results. I know that when I personally think back to the intermarried relatives I estranged many years ago, I am filled with shame and regret. Someone else in my family does the same thing, perhaps worse in a certain ways, and I am horrified as I watch it happen over and over.

Such behavior and freezing out of family members creates misery and estrangement. Neither is a problem for Big Kiruv. The contempt for those outside of Judaism does not have to be as blatant and vulgar as “Shwartzie” for it to have deleterious results for the Baal Teshuvah and his family when he adopts these intolerant policies.

This is an extension of the famous question, “Which is more important? The mishputim (rational laws) or the chukim (irrational laws)?

Maya writes on Beyond BT,

After we got home from Kol Nidre last Yom Kippur, my dad asked me if G-d prefers someone who observes all the laws of Shabbas and kashrus yet acts immorally in dealings with people, ie in the workplace, or someone who is a good person, acts ethically in business, yet does not observe Shabbas or kashrus.

Let me clarify things for Maya’s Dad from a heimshe perpsective.

If someone prioritizes that other ultra-Orthodox Jews act ethically in business over acting sufficiently haredi, they are probably either baal teshuvahs or aren’t really frum, or both.

If someone wears a black hat and is careful about kashrut (that is to say, shuns the non-haredi rabbinical hechshers as insufficient whenever possible), it doesn’t matter if he steals people blind or touches little boys (provided there is no penetration!). He is still better than those people who eat like animals and know not the laws of the rabbis.

And now seems like a good time for a little reminder to my Manhattan friends: It is getting warmer, and some of you are being lax. Remember! It is forbidden to walk between two dogs, two pigs, or two women. Please be advised. Don’t be a sheigetz who walks down the street without protecting his path from darkness and spiritual danger.

I have said it before…or at least, I have thought it. There is nowhere to go except within. Communally, Judaism itself does not improve in liberal communities. It just gets goofy. And frankly, that’s a damn shame.

POLJ bears witness that,

As I have mentioned before I am privileged to take the class “Exodus and Revolutions” sponsored mainly by AJWS and Avodah and few other cool [editor's note: please don't use the word "cool" in this context ever, ever again. It sounds fucking awful. You are making us vomit even before you give us reason.] organizations. We talk about oppression and the Exodus and other such Jewish-lefty-entitled things. [See POLJ's original post for links]

Okay. One we are defining Judaism in “Jewish-lefty” terms, we know two things. 1) This is going to be bullshit, and 2) This class is going nowhere interesting.

Where exactly is nowhere interesting? Here:

When class ended a man in the back called our attention to the fact that a vast majority of the class is women while a vast majority of the air time (his words) has been dominated by men[...]

In that there is a majority of folks in this class are women it is pretty clear they are free from the sexism that would have kept them out twenty-five years ago. However they may not yet be free to engage, explained this person in the back of class.

I find the whole exercise suspicious. To his credit, POLJ doesn’t buy it, but what I would have asked the gentleman insisting that women are too oppressed to speak is,

“Are you single?”

If his answer was in any way approaching “yes,” I would have asked,

“Are you in any way trying to get laid?”

Anyway, the funny thing is, yesterday in my class, which is filled with CCNY leftists, (and these aren’t the same as Jew-Leftists, my friends) I defended Roosevelt’s imperialist tendencies against a rigid, feminist interpretation.

These women are not quiet. And I kicked their ass. You know why, POLJ? Because I am liberated like that.

In an amazing post on Emes Ve-Emunah, a Rabbi Blau email is reprinted — with his permission — in which Rabbi Blau defends the newspaper that took Rabbi Lanner down, noting,

I have been asked to comment on Gary Rosenblatt’s series of articles about Baruch Lanner June 2000. Knowing the background of the story and his willingness not to go to print if the OU would act decisively I can only applaud Gary Rosenblatt for his concern for survivors and potential victims. If the story had not appeared it is possible that Rabbi Lanner would be presently working for NCSY.

Rabbi Blau also writes,

The question that disturbs me is why the Orthodox community has learned so little many scandals and almost eight years later? It would be better if proper procedures would exist for responding to allegations of sexual abuse and newspaper reports would not be necessary. The Chilul HaShem is caused by the abusers, their enablers and those who cover up[...] Instead of blaming the reporters and the bloggers let us seriously confront the problem and protect our children.

That won’t happen. It won’t happen because the ultra-Orthodox community would have to 1) give up its sense of victimology, and 2) recognize that they have problems they pretend only others have.

Better to blame it on bloggers and the “Ortho-bashing” media.

I have a new website address, now. That Jewschool thing did not work out… anyway, don’t worry about it. No, I said I don’t want to talk about it! No, no, be quiet!

So please change your links to: kvetcher.net/.

So…do you like my new place? I know, it needs some fixing up and everything…but it sure is nice to get out of the dorms.

A Moreshet trip is being planned to turn our youth into penguin zombies. It is being backed by the Jewish Agency!! Failed Messiah has the story.

I am becoming more and more certain that the only way to stop these people is to move aggressively, not defensively. To develop literature and a curriculum like Discovery to recruit haredi Jews–preferably young haredi Jews– to become secular. BUT ONLY AT THEIR OWN PACE!!!!

They need to learn that the Torah cannot be literal; the reality of scientific method, and the error of our sages throughout history in this regard; the failures of “daas Torah;” etc.

Only through fighting back will we both reveal who they really are, and slow the unwanted recruitment of our youth into fundamentalism.

Start recruiting their youth, and the penguins will start rioting and burning shit down like the Muslims do when someone draws a cartoon. Education is great, but getting the haredim to reveal themselves consistently, through chaos and violence, is better. We may not be able to beat them, but we can get them to beat themselves.

ONLY THE BEST FOR OUR PUBLIC SCHOOL KIDS!

In an effort to “increase options? for Jews from public school backgrounds, Rabbi Burg has hired Rabbi Ori Shulevant to recruit public school graduates to Bais Ezra College. Bais Ezra was previously known as a program for mentally disabled adults, but now, thanks to the efforts of Rabbi Burg, public school graduates will be able to attend these elite programs as well.

Rabbi Burg explained that, “While its true that the Bais Ezra population may have had exposure to Orthodox culture at an earlier age, we are hopeful and confident that the public school graduates will be able to integrate successfully.

Rabbi Shafran of Agudath Israel has dismissed concerns that the developmentally disabled haredi population is inappropriate for integration with public school graduates merely because the former come from culturally insular backgrounds, noting, “Bais Ezra families are well known to be open-minded when it comes to their children marrying partners from secular backgrounds.

Steve Savitzky, the president of the Orthodox Union, pointed to Rina Kaplinsky, noting with obvious pride that, “Rina wanted to go to medical school and become a brain surgeon, but now she sits on the couch with the other residents, stares into space, and hums along to songs about mashiach.

Kaplinsky noted that, “I had doubts at first, but after they got my prescription right, things have been just great.

Anat (formerly “Beth) Rubenstein agrees, noting, “It’s so much easier to be frum in a non-ambulatory environment.

Ron Coleman, who teaches the residents how to write their name with crayons (attending this class requires the authorization of a social worker), denies that Bais Ezra is any less appropriate for public school graduates than a state or city school, and dismissed the almost hundred I.Q. point disparity between the public school students and the regular Bais Ezra population as “culturally biased against Orthodoxy’s developmentally disabled.

Applications are due five minutes before attending.

Rabbi Burg, the national director of NCSY, has an Op-Ed in this week’s Forward. Rabbi Burg is excited about Princeton’s decision “to enable students to work overseas before ever setting foot on the college campus.

While I understand why Rabbi Burg feels this is public validation on the merits of a year abroad (NCSY encourages its youth group membership to attend Israeli yeshivas for a year), Rabbi Burg also notes,

“Among yeshivas, there are a wide variety of options, for teens of all backgrounds and previous levels of education. Many yeshivas also offer joint year-abroad options with schools such as Yeshiva University and Touro College, which assists those concerned with college credits and the possibility of financial assistance.?

First of all, I think Rabbi Burg should be commended for his honesty about where these yeshiva students are being guided. In fact, NCSY itself heavily promotes and recruits for these dual curriculum schools, and has done so for decades. However, I would appeal to secular and liberal Jews–-and these are the Jews who comprise the Forward’s targeted readership—that Touro College is absolutely not academically acceptable for our youth.

I think Rabbi Burg should accept this already. Touro needs to be taken off the table of preferred choices for secular and liberal Jews by the yeshivas and seminaries that NCSY sends them to. Perhaps instead, as a compromise, Rabbi Burg could make a deal with Princeton and other Ivy League schools, as well as schools not in the Ivy League, but far, far superior to the likes of third tier Touro.

Earlier: Educating Rina, an Orthodox Union *success* story

Emanuel Feldman has an essay rebuking Elliot Spitzer published on at least two sites in addition to the Jerusalem Post, on both Big Aish and Cross-Currents, both ultra-Orthodox sites. While it sure is wonderful that the fahfrumpt are taking time out to discuss the secular former governor and how he was guilty of immorality, I can’t help but wonder why these sites are consistently silent on the problem of sexual abuse in their own communities, and the role that their Great Ones have played in enabling it.

Look at this!

Gov. Spitzer did not invent or discover immorality. He is preceded by a centuries-old lineup of presidents, kings, prime ministers, and ordinary politicians.

Gee…I wonder who else you could put on this list a little closer to home?

Unbelievable.

I give both Big Aish and Cross-Currents a heter not to drink this Purim. They already are long past the point of “ad lo yada.”

The film “Cut” will be shown this coming Tuesday at the West Side JCC. I have to say that the crowd I met downtown at this film was sympathetic to a large extent. I wonder if the JCC crowd will be hostile…

Anyway, if you are around, it is an excellent movie on what for me, at least, was a very difficult issue for a long time. I became troubled by circumcision even while still in a haredi yeshiva, because of the commentaries I read on the subject. They suggest similar effects of male circumcision that are given for performing some forms of FGM on girls. Which makes sense. Some forms are quite similar. It was shocking to me to read these arguments absolutely in line with our sages on anti-circumcision sites years later, and infuriating to then see so many in the Jewish community denounce these people as liars, frauds, and “anti-Semites,” even though they are often in-line with our own texts. But I no longer expect honesty from the Jewish community, and I have come to peace that I can’t expect to find a solution within Judaism. Once you stop trying to resolve both worlds, it gets a little easier. Everything stops hurting quite as much. It still hurts, but not with the same urgency.

My review of the film is here on Jewschool. There is apparently a quote from it on the DVD back cover.