Reform Woman Frums It Up for a Shabbat
December 10, 2008 Liberal Judaism, Reform
Sometimes, you want to see what’s on the other side. How the right-wingers live.
So JanetheWriter decided stepped to step outside her comfort zone, and decided to see how the frummies spend shabbat. So she went hardcore. To the JTS, the Conservative movement’s theological seminary.
These are excerpts from her tell all report on RJ.
Along the way, Jeanne told me that JTS students are required to be shomer shabbos. Before we entered the building on Broadway, therefore, I shut off my cell phone.[...] After brief introductions all around and blessings over wine and challah, we enjoyed a traditional Shabbat dinner — chicken, rice, vegetables and salad, all prepared by Jeremy, following his Friday classes.
Janetthewriter kept her personal religious identity hidden.
Although I followed only a few threads of the philosophical and intellectual discourse, I picked up enough to sense that among some within this group there existed deep disdain for Reform Judaism and its dismissal of halacha . Nonetheless, I disclosed to Aviva, the young woman across the table from me, from whence I came, and she in turn told me that she works part-time at Congregation Rodeph Sholom, and was surprised at how “traditional” a congregation she’s found it to be.
She further disclosed that she “can’t do the imahot,” and we chatted about the wide spectrum that is Reform Judaism, the autonomy of individual congregations, and the trend toward more traditional practice within the Movement. As is often the case, I was proud to be a Reform Jew.
Following dinner we “benched” – the familiar birkat ha-Mazon sandwiched (no pun intended) between seemingly endless text and melodies that were wholly unknown to me. I found it nearly impossible to keep up without losing my place in the bencher despite a transliteration of the prayers. Not since early in my first semester of college, when I attended a kabbalat Shabbat service sponsored by Hillel at Lafayette, had I felt such a blush of shame at my Jewish illiteracy. And yet, my sense of having entered sacred time was palpable. There was no urgency, no rushing, no gotta-get-it-done frenzy. Rather, a joyful calm filled the lounge and all of us in it.
As Jeanne and I made our way back to the subway a short while later, I pulled out my cell phone. Ready to turn it back on, I remembered the lounge — and that joyful calm – and, still off, put it back into my bag. Whatever messages it contained could certainly wait until the morning.
8 comments
That’s fine for the JTS attendees, but the casual Conservative congregant isn’t all that shomer anything. Whether that is good or bad depends on the way you worship.
JTS is “hard core”?
I think he was being sardonic.
“but the casual Conservative congregant isn’t all that shomer anything”
suitepotato, you’d be surprised. I know a number of Conservative Jews who can rattle off Tanach by heart effortlessly. Their knowledge of Halacha is very advanced, and I have even asked them shaylas.
DK,
I don’t really know why you are bringing this woman to light. There is nothing odd about what she is doing. So what if she knows nothing about Judaism and is going to JTS for a traditional meal? I am happy for her, that she is going outside of her comfort zone. At least she learned a lot about Shobbas and came out of it a proud Jew.
And JTS has a lot to offer. I may not agree with the Conservative view on the Divinity of the Torah, but most of the other stuff is in line with religious Judaism. As I said I know a few JTS people, Rabbincal grads who are top notch is their knowledge and practice. Many Conservative JTSers have way more passion about the Torah than I will ever have. I am almost jealous.
Naomi,
I think the point DK was trying to make was that she wasn’t going outside of her comfort zone — and that her conception of what is frum is out of wack. Her hesitance to disclose her Reform identity is comical. What did she think they were going to do, throw acid in her face?
This is not journalism, and our Jewish publications more often than not print this kind of shtuss.
If nothing else, this article sheds light on the issue of how different denominations perceive each other.
Ask most Orthodox or Reform Jews about Conservative Jews, and unless they actually know observant ones, they’ll describe Reform Jews. Ask Reform Jews about Orthodox Jews, they’ll tell you about the nearest Chabad rabbi. Ask observant Conservative Jews about (non- black hat wearing) Orthodox Jews, they’ll come close to describing themselves. But ask them about Reform, and they’ll describe secular. So yes, it is believable (and understandable) that the JTS students made fun of Reform anti-halachic practice. The author doesn’t know how lucky she is that her friend didn’t take her to YU.
The author’s perception of how a Conservative Jew acts was pre-conceived. She was surprised at how different the JTS-ers were from the Conservative Jews she knew, who likely aren’t Jews who follow the Conservative movement’s ideology (just like many Orthodox shul-goers don’t actually follow lots of basic halachot, and I’ve personally known lots of Reform temple goers who they’re the same as Unitarians).
So she got a little educated. Good for her. She even opted to keep her phone off for the day. Something wore off on her. Unfortunately, most Jews don’t have the opportunity or the inclination to stretch a little and pick up new knowledge. Hopefully, a few of them will read that article.
HS,
“I think the point DK was trying to make was that she wasn’t going outside of her comfort zone — and that her conception of what is frum is out of wack.”
Yes, I am aware of the points DK is making
(I’m swift like that). I feel, however, that for this woman her experience at JTS was indeed out of her comfort zone. It was new and different and inspiring and religious. For the author, shutting off her cell phone, for instance, was huge. Being shomer shobbas for a few hours was something special and scary at the same time. We cannot make fun of her perceptions, especially since this is a first for her and she did not grow up with the knowledge of Torah on any level. It was also her perception, be it true or projected, that to divulge being Reform was somethings of a danger. She may have been right to trust her instinct, or at the very least be cautious in a new environment where she was a minority among strong Conservative men and women. Eventually, should she forge ahead religiously, she’ll figure things out.
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